With Risk Comes Reward
by Christen Murphy Resmo
You could live a lesser life…but why?Are you ready to take the risk that you’ve been contemplating lately?
At the start of this program I encouraged you to hit the pause button for a while and take a much closer look inside of yourself. I asked you to consider following your heart’s desires and suggested that you can do anything that you can also visualize and see yourself doing. Are you still a little worried about being a failure or about the hard work involved? Has your caution turned into paralysis or are you finding the courage to move through your inner resistance?
In a simple and well-expressed manner, it was Will Rogers who said:
“You’ve got to go out on a limb sometimes because that is where the fruit is.”
This means that many fruitful rewards are out there and ready for the taking. And these wonderful prizes might be a little out of reach so the only way to attain them is to risk stepping out on a limb. In saying this, it’s also important to understand that risk taking is not about foolishly throwing caution to the wind or carelessly cheering yourself on to your own demise. No, successful and effective risk taking is not at all synonymous with folly, recklessness and damaging self-sabotage. And following your bliss is not about chasing after pie-in-the sky imaginings or gambling all your chips with one hand either. For example, risk taking is not to be confused with turning a blind eye to your financial situation with a “no worries” attitude until you eventually bankrupt yourself or having “no fear” such that you push your body beyond its physical limits and therefore injure yourself by trying something well past your capabilities.
Taking risks from a coach’s perspective is about taking a responsible stand for your life and about being accountable to what matters most to you. In a sense, Risk is about answering the call to your greatness with an enthusiastic willingness to stretch yourself — but in a levelheaded way. This means that you’ll happily go out on a limb when it’s needed, remaining tied by a rope to the tree when it’s prudent to do so.
Sometimes taking a risk means speaking up for yourself even though you might be ridiculed, or leaving a harmful and unhealthy situation behind you now — one that you feared leaving in the past because you didn’t want to be alone. Sometimes taking a risk means trying something new and scary like speaking in public because you hope to develop a new skill or advance in your career. In the end, risk taking is a very real and essential part of going for a bigger goal.
While I don’t recommend that you exuberantly run headlong into anything totally unsubstantiated, I also don’t suggest that you overanalyze things either. If you are a methodical person, make sure that you’re not confusing great thinking with great results. If you do, you could easily get stuck in the examination and study phase and find yourself epitomizing the condition of analysis-paralysis, which boils down to too much contemplation followed by very little to no action.
Get Off the Fence
The mind of the seasoned risk-taker is always open. It is an empty vessel eagerly waiting to be filled with new knowledge. This well traveled veteran knows that any experience, pleasant or unpleasant, contains life wisdom that is important for his learning. In addition, this person does not sit on the fence and wait for life to come to him. Instead, he leaps off and takes the first few steps himself. He also trusts that as he does this, he instantly causes a positive ripple effect in the future. As I prepared this topic for you, I also understood that it can be difficult to set new goals and change course mid-way through life. Why is this? I think it’s because we’re human and humans are creatures of habit and comfort. We play out our well-known patterns and routines because they’re familiar to us. In a sense, we play it safe because we get used to living life in a certain way. And that’s perfectly understandable. Let’s face it; the simple act of living can be risky enough at times without adding more challenges. And yet, staying perched safely on the fence can feel a lot like settling for less. New York Times Columnist, Maureen Dowd, reminds us:
“The minute you settle for less than you deserve, you get even less than you settled for.”
When you take an honest inventory of your present-day situation, there may indeed be an area where your comfort has turned into your cozy little rut. So if you remain confused or sleepy with procrastination, your own life takes a back-seat. In a sense, you suffer a kind of secondary treatment.
Are you playing it safe when you really want to take a risk?
You too can become a seasoned risk-taker! You can balance careful research and analysis with an openness to learning as you go along. You can temper your sheer passion and youthful zest for the goal with an attitude of awareness and strategy. With this approach, you really can rest easy because you’re working in a healthy state of internal equilibrium.
If you’re on the fence with a situation that really matters to you, maybe it’s time to hop off now. Are you sitting there because you still have some viable options to consider or are you simply stalling? If you are stalling, raise your personal standards considerably on this day and risk leaping off that fence! Quit letting fear or a lower standard stop you now. Your conditions will not become so chaotic that you can’t handle them. You can handle them and you can take a risk. Start small if you have to. You can even keep a hand on the fencepost if you must, but do risk jumping off to one side or the other. It’s time to live.
Risk Listening to Your Inner Guide
Each one of us has an internal emotional guidance system designed to direct us to our own individual answers. We can call upon it at anytime provided we have the courage to really listen. Your intuition, or heart-centered self, is your real self trying to work its way through the wall of resistance that you’ve built up over time. More often than not, your intuitive self will ask that you take risks because it wants more for you. But don’t’ worry; you’ll never get more guidance than you can handle at one time. Instead, your inner voice whispers with simple encouragement, “You can do it. Just take the next step and I’ll remind you of the one after that.” Your authentic self is a natural born risk-taker because it’s brave and fearless to the core and it knows what is best for you.
Fear of the unknown, fear of pain and rejection or fear of loneliness are just a few of the reasons why we choose to ignore our intuitive inner guide. Therefore, we end up spinning our wheels or remain stuck in situations that are far from fulfilling. But your conscious self must learn to trust your intuitive self! In order to create more happiness, you must also develop the ability to silence the noise of your conscious fears so that your inner guide can openly communicate with you.
Allow your mind to be still and silent. And when the answers do come, risk listening to them! Yes, you might be encouraged to speak up on your own behalf, quit a job, sell your house, go back to school, invest money in a business, step away from a friendship that is not supportive or take any number of other risks that I haven’t mentioned. But it really is okay. In fact, it’s good. There’s so much personal growth in store for you. The more you learn to drop your resistance and trust your intuitive guide, the more aligned you will become with your true desires and this authentic self. Pay attention! What message has been trying to break through the surface of your conscious mind? Are you ready to risk listening to it?
The Easy Road Isn’t Always the Right Road
So often we prefer to take the easy road and remain in our safety zone only to realize later that we’ve gotten no closer to achieving our heart’s desires. For example, many of us have been tempted to ignore the writing on the wall and stay in unfulfilling relationships — even when we’re grossly unhappy and know we should leave. Some of us have remained in dead end jobs that bring no satisfaction or a poor income.
Have you ever lingered in an unfulfilling situation despite your better judgment?
I have. I’ve stayed in relationships and jobs for far too long even when I knew that it was time to move on. I simply needed to find the courage to leave. I think a certain comfort comes from staying with the devil we know versus venturing into the unknown, until it gets too intolerable to stay that is. Whenever I get stuck, I find that it helps to ponder this question: Is staying here, in this unhappy place, even more risky than moving on to a potentially much happier one? While the answer has usually been an obviously “yes”, sometimes I find it hard to muster up the courage to take the first few steps. This has been true even when my intuition was practically shouting at me to do so. And when I finally did listen and therefore risked, things really did work out for the best. What about you? When was the last time you went against your intuition only to later say, “I knew I should have listened to myself!”?
Go Ahead and Do It Scared
To make great progress is to take great risks. So, in order to make progress, you might have to risk looking like a fool for the love of your goal. But you can do it. You can risk people laughing at you for following your heart and you can leave the safe road behind to risk a path that feels more adventurous or rewarding to you. Yes risk may cause fear but there’s nothing wrong with being scared. Everyone feels fear, even those who don’t take risks so you may as well go ahead with the life you dream of. Go ahead and do it scared. Your fear doesn’t have to stop you or control your actions. In regards to the risk that you’re contemplating now, just remember this: you can accomplish whatever you believe you can, whatever you decide to act upon and whatever you can envision for yourself. It really is okay to make some waves and face some criticism.
It’s okay if you’re loved ones throw out negative comments and roadblocks. This won’t last forever. It’s quite possible (if not certain) that you’ll eventually receive the admiration and appreciation of your loved ones as you dare to live your best life. In fact, you will fail them if you fail to be yourself. Everyone benefits when you find the nerve and confidence to step forward despite your fears and despite the temporary resistance presented to you.
Confidence is Something You Earn
Don’t wait to feel confident before you take the risk that you’ve been considering lately. And don’t expect for your fear to subside beforehand either. Most certainly, don’t hang around until the world agrees with your decisions and above all, don’t hope to reach consensus with everyone in your life before you make a move. Take a risk! Do it for the love of your goal!
And don’t worry. Confidence, personal growth, self-reliance, support and the ability to manage fear will all come later. These are just some of the great prizes that you’ll earn after a risk is taken. I encourage to live according to your own plans first. Then, the rewards will readily flow toward you.
If They Can Do It, You Can Do It Too
Have you ever caught yourself saying, “If they can do it, I can do it too?” Well, it’s true! You were right about that. You are no different or any less capable than the person or people that you’re comparing yourself to. If you’re still telling yourself that you can’t, stop it. Can’t is a word that has been held in your mind for far too long now. When you say “I can’t”, you hold your mind into a negative thinking pattern. And you give yourself permission to give up. Then, you’ll start to find all kinds of logical and practical reasons for why you aren’t able to go after what you really want. And while these excuses might sound reasonable, they’re really just creative ways to avoid your fear or justify playing it safe. “I can’t” does NOT serve your growth. It only serves to keep you stuck or support you in sliding backward. But when you focus on the polar opposite and say “I CAN” you open yourself up to a wellspring of ideas and inspiration.
“I CAN” helps you call upon the inner daring that has been inside of you all along. Your “I CAN” attitude is more important than your IQ or your knowledge, background and expertise all wrapped up in one package. You don’t necessarily have to be smart to achieve your goals, but you do have to be willing. Willing to learn, change, grow and stretch yourself.
With Risk Comes Reward
And here is why:
1) Your greatest feeling of satisfaction and accomplishment follows your greatest risk. No one gets very excited about accomplishing something easy. It’s fun to be challenged and to feel that special satisfaction of a tough job done well.
2) Your real pleasure will come from your labor not from you leisure time You might have to risk yourself to live a life of purpose and meaning. Your choice might not be a popular one but when you make up your mind to do what counts, you’ll also experience the rewards of making a difference in this world.
3) You will experience dynamic personal growth when you take a risk. Vibrant and lasting inner change occurs when you risk yourself in the face of resistance and challenges because you’ll understand more deeply what you are made of. When you look fear directly in the face and courageously take a step forward anyway, you’ll come out a winner for the simple reason that you took that step.
4) You exponentially increase your odds of success. When you risk yourself, you do expose yourself to a chance of losing, but you also expose yourself to the chance of winning.
Step One: Acknowledge How Far You Have Come
You already know how to take risks. This is because you’ve taken thousands of them, big and small, to get to where you are right now. Perhaps you are an accomplished athlete or a talented musician. Perhaps you are a skilled professional, a gifted parent or an expert practitioner. What has been your biggest risk in life up to this point? How did it turn out for you? Chances are, you grew a lot from that experience and attained more than just money or position or prestige. Are you ready to put those same risk-taking skills to use, to move up to the next level of success? You CAN do it. You’ve already done it. And you have the strength to do it again.
Step Two: Develop Into Someone Great
The key to an abundant life lies in risking yourself to live fully, expressively and authentically. It’s okay if you look foolish to some. A great life is often preceded by great risks. When you engage in pursuits that have purpose and meaning to you personally, you develop into someone truly great. So step outside of your cozy (yet terribly confining) comfort zone and experience yourself in a whole new way. Go ahead and have fun with it. Go find out what you’re really made of. You may just surprise and delight yourself.
Step Three: Remain Willing to Grow
There is always more to discover and understand. Success is found in your willingness to risk change and try new things. If you’ve ever harbored regrets and thought, “I should have done more with my life and I should be further along by now,” it’s not really the past that you’re struggling with, it’s your present. You want things to be different now; but to achieve a different result, you must risk trying a different approach. So focus on what you want to change and trust that change is already happening. We know that nothing grows without our love and attention and nothing remains the same when we give it our energy. Risk yourself for the things that matter. Commit yourself to your own personal development and an entire lifetime of learning and growing.
Consider This Orison Swett Marden, Founder of Success Magazine, said:
“Most of our obstacles would melt away if, instead of cowering before them, we should make up our minds to walk boldly through them.”
John Ruskin, Artist and Author said:
“The highest reward for a person’s toil is not what they get for it, but what they become by it.”
Coaching Tip: No matter how quickly you’re moving toward your goal, I’d like to gently remind you that you are not a failure if you experience failure along the way. You’re only fail for good if you quit on yourself or give up what matters most to you. And even then you can change your mind and risk again. As you allow your true self to be expressed, you will grow into someone truly beautiful. In fact, you will shine.
Coaching Questions
- What risk am I ready to take now, even if I am a little nervous?
- What would I have to risk to advance my personal growth?
- What risk has been calling out to me? Will I actually listen and then go for it?
- What risk would help me achieve my goal more quickly?
- If I displayed 100% confidence, what BIG risk would I take?
Coaching Action Challenge
Your coaching action challenge is to consider actually taking that risk you’ve been contemplating lately. How hard would it be to go for it for real? Are you telling yourself, “I can’t” or “Now is not the time, it won’t work” or “Maybe I’ll get to it later”? Or are you saying, “I think I can, why not; maybe I really could get started”? Well I say, Go ahead and take that risk. If not now, then when? See what happens even if you are a little scared.
Core Concepts
· Risk taking is not synonymous with gambling
· Risk is a necessary ingredient in going for a bigger goal
· Personal growth happens as you step beyond your comfort zone
· As you risk, you’ll discover new and hidden capabilities
· It doesn’t matter what happened in the past; focus on the future and take the required risks needed to get there
· Highly successful people are no different from you, they simply take many risks
Risk Success Formula:
“I CAN” + Willingness to take Risks = Rewarding Tangible Results
Risk Bottom Line: Taking risks is a very real and essential part of creating a fulfilling and Abundant Life, one that reflects your true desires and who you really are
