If You Believe It, You Will Achieve It
By Christen Resmo
Is it really true that you can’t achieve your heart’s desires? Or has your inner critic been telling you lies, that up until now, you have chosen to believe?
Years ago, when I was in my mid-twenties, I took up the sport of rock-climbing in the mountains of my Colorado home. I clearly remember a moment when I was asked to work with the power of my belief. I was moving up a steep, exposed rock face with very few reliable hand and foot holds and was inching toward a foreboding overhang. I was also up against the limits of my physical ability and was shaking uncontrollably from fatigue. My very competent climbing partner had me securely roped-in and was keeping a watchful eye on me from a safe place below, and while I never felt my life was in danger, I was still extremely anxious. I called down, “I don’t see my next move and I’m tired.” My partner called up to me in a firm tone, “Tell yourself you can do it.” I again called out, “No I can’t! I’m nervous! Let me down now.” He replied, “Your mind can hear you, so change it.” Clearly, he wasn’t going to let me off that easily. So I did hang in there, telling myself with each tiny movement upward, “I can do this, I can do this.” And it worked! I successfully inched my way over the top and was so exhilarated once I finally got there. I felt the kind of exhilaration which comes only after I do something that I didn’t always know I could.
What I remember even more vividly is what my partner said to me later, “I won’t climb with you Christen if you say, ‘I can’t’. This is a fun sport, but it’s a dangerous one too and the fun isn’t worth the fall.” He challenged me to understand how my mind responds when I say, “I’m going to fall” and to reverse my thinking by believing I can do anything I set my mind to. He taught me not to risk my life, or risk anything for that matter, by faltering in my belief.
You Will Only Go As Far As You Believe You Will
The second step in the Your Abundant Life™ program is Decision. I encouraged you to turn a wish into a reality by intentionally deciding to go for it. I asked you to choose at least one thing, big or small, that you’re ready to claim by saying, “Yes, I’m in! That’s the way for me. I will go after this goal and settle for nothing less!”
Your Vision and Decision have set your course. Now, do you really believe that you’ll reach your desired destination? If not, you could seriously hamper your progress and cause numerous and unnecessary delays. Without Belief, you might even abandon your goal at the first sign of hardship. You’ve got to believe! You see, you’ll only go as far as your level of believe allows. This means, the size of your success is equivalent to the size of your belief and you are only limited by the scope of your belief. If you set a goal that you don’t really buy into, you might as well scrap it and start over. This is not because you don’t deserve it. You do deserve it but you must believe that it’s possible to reach your goal such that you actually do so successfully.
So, you have set a goal! Do you really believe that you will get there?
Belief Keeps You Moving Forward
No matter how clear your vision is or how solid you’re decision is, your belief is what allows you to stay engaged in the dream. Your belief will help you get through those hard days when you don’t know what’s around the next corner, and you don’t know if you have enough strength to get there to find out. Nothing else will help you like belief when the going gets tough and everything appears to be working against you. Belief is that inner character strength which fortifies you during the worst of times. Without it, you might find it to be too easy to quit on yourself before you fully realize your dream or experience all of who you really are.
Vision determines your direction, Decision is the spark that jump-starts action, and Belief is the powerful force that keeps you actively moving forward despite the challenges and the unexpected. The faith and belief you infuse into your goal will help sustain you on the journey, even in the face of overwhelming evidence to its improbability. With belief and consistent participation in the goal, what once seemed impossible begins to look probable until one day the dream suddenly appears before you, becoming an absolute certainty.
We Become Who We Believe We Are
Everyone has the exact same access to success and happiness but that doesn’t mean every person experiences success and happiness. Why is this so? One reason is that successful, happy people operate from a totally different set of core beliefs than those who harbor severely negative ones or who have closed their minds to new ideas. Core beliefs are what allow one woman to rise to the top of her field while another equally capable woman is afraid to ask for even a dollar an hour pay raise for fear of losing her job, which she doesn’t like anyway; but in her mind there is nothing better out there.
You see, we get out of life what we believe we’ll get out of life. And you will become the person you believe you are. You’ll even get from yourself what you expect to get. If you’re already enjoying great success, these results are clear indicators that your predominant, core beliefs are positive and self-empowering. And the parts of your life where you’ve been the most successful say a lot about how you see yourself too. For example, if you believe you’re great with people, chance are you have a lot of meaningful relationships. If you believe your good with numbers, chances are your checkbook is perfectly balanced or you chose to work with numbers and figures in your career. On the flip side, if you believe that you’re a terrible speaker or that nobody cares what you have to say, chances are you would be completely terrified if you were asked to stand up and speak in public.
Be Willing to Re-think Your Assumptions about Yourself
Most of us fall into the habit of thinking we already know all there is to know about ourselves. But do we? On top of that, some of our deeply-held convictions can be so confining that they only serve to get in our way. Are we questioning them enough? We also allow other people, who are operating from their own set of limiting beliefs, to influence us. Even exceptional, loving and well-meaning people in our families, schools and churches tell us who we should be, or what we should do. Some ask that we follow along with the crowd or stick to the ‘right’ path because they honestly think it’s best for us. But what if they’re wrong? If we’re not vigilant, we could so easily find ourselves boxed-in by other people’s expectations and then wonder why we’re unhappy or unfulfilled.
What if everybody, including you, is way off the mark and hasn’t even come close to knowing all of who you can be?
I’ve asked myself these questions too.
• What if I don’t know everything there is to know about me?
• What would my life be like if I released all the opinions and expectations that other people have of me?
• What would happen if I let go of that old version of myself, the one that is not a true reflection of me?
The first step to building a strong belief is to be honest with yourself about how you hold yourself back. What beliefs have become old, worn-out and tired? While some of your beliefs are empowering, admit it, you’ve been holding onto others that don’t honor you. Have you noticed how belittling some of your automatic internal conversations are? As you become aware of beliefs that don’t serve you, you can then change them or release them entirely by no longer accept them as true for you. Be on guard and remain ever diligent such that you quickly say ‘no’ to false beliefs and replace those thoughts with far better ones. Entertain new ideas about your greatness because greatness is your one true nature. One very helpful thing you can affirm is this, “There are wondrous things about myself that I don’t know or fully understand, and I’m willing to change my mind about me.” With this attitude, “I can’t” becomes “I can”. “I’m not good enough” becomes “I deserve more than this.” “I’m never going to amount to much” becomes “I will achieve great love, great success and great happiness!”
Ready to go further? Then just change your mind!
Thinking poorly about yourself is a simple matter of conditioning. This means your thinking can be undone through the willingness to change your mind. Stop agreeing with a lower picture of who you are. Maybe you’ve been too hard on yourself and it’s time to accept the fact that you’re a lot more amazing than you’ve given yourself credit for.
Starting today, you can talk to yourself more encouragingly. This is a skill that you might have to relearn but don’t worry. With each and every earnest effort, you’ll eventually master it until you routinely accept and know your true self. We are all in the process of waking up to who we truly are. This is the ultimate goal because a fabulous life stems from a solid belief in, and a clear understanding of, our true nature.
The Irony of Belief
Belva Davis, broadcast journalist and one of the first female African American TV reporters said,
“Don’t be afraid of the space between your dream and reality. If you can dream it, you can make it so. “
Belief is the principle that asks you to go ahead with your plans while having absolutely no proof that things will work out the way you want them to. In most cases, there will be no hard evidence that you’ll succeed initially. Almost every journey begins at the place of uncertainty, but uncertainty doesn’t have to stop you because belief is the attitude that creates certainty. When I was climbing up that rock face I told you about, my belief was the only thing I had left in me to rely on. I had to know with certainty that I could make it to the top even though I had never experienced doing so.
Ironically, while there are no guarantees of success, the more you believe that you will succeed, the more you’ll find yourself actually succeeding. And the more that you believe in the mysterious forces of life as a reliable source of support, then miraculously, the more those surprising and happy coincidences occur to help you. This bolsters more belief. As you continue to trust that everything will turn out okay and that the right people will show up to lend a hand, then right you are. Strangely, helpful circumstances, people and events do come around exactly when you need them to. The power of your belief opens the doors of opportunity and allows good things to flow readily into your reality. But belief must come before your proof. Belief is what brings your proof. That’s the irony of belief. You have to believe and expect that good things are in store for you, and that everything will work out for the best, even before you’ve experienced it.
Your certainty of success seems to call upon serendipity, which orchestrates life in such a way that your results will come together favorably and in perfect timing. Only then will you begin to understand how right you were to believe. So even if it doesn’t feel natural at first, you must trust in yourself and in your abilities before you can fully understand how trustworthy and capable you are. And you must trust that your life will line up to support you too. As you do this, I suggest you prepare yourself for flood of good things; because when you work with the awesome power of unquestioning belief, you will have many fateful days when you’ll stand amazed and astonished at how life co-operates with you effortlessly and miraculously.
Leap and Trust the Net Will Appear
Sometimes you’ll have to put it on the line for something that you truly desire because it’s the only way you’re going to make progress. Sometimes you’re asked to have the faith to jump without knowing how things will happen, trusting that the net will appear. Are you there now? If so, you must let go and let God; and let the mysterious process of your life unfold. This can be so incredibly difficult, to relinquish the belief that you don’t have to do it all and that help is on the way, especially when there is no aid in site. And it can be hard to put your trust in others, to give up control and accept the help when it does come – and it will come in many forms. You also don’t have to control everything and the reality is you won’t. It can be a big relief when you come to understand that it’s not all up to you and it doesn’t have to be.
Do you have the faith, the knowingness, that the assistance you need is on the way to help you succeed?
We’ve all had times in our lives when our belief gets tested, when we’re called upon to take a leap of faith. My ultimate tests of belief was when I left my nursing career which was safe and secure to venture into a profession that most people had never even heard of. At that time, professional coaching was a very new and relatively untested field. On top of that, I was a well trained and specialized cardiac RN and that made it even harder for me to break free. I had myself SO defined! In my entire first two years of business I felt like I was in a total free-fall and that was scary. But I also believed that the net would eventually appear. And it always did. I then began to take much greater risks and sometimes it looked like I was just inches away from hitting the ground hard and fast. Even then, the net always appeared and gratefully, it continues to show up and catch me to this very day. So even when your belief gets tested, you must remember that you wouldn’t have the ability to come up with a dream without also having the ability to make it come true.
When was the last time you took a leap of faith?
Is now the time to take another?
Step One: Create from a Place of Worthiness
Most of us still need to work on our own feelings of worthiness. The bottom line for everyone to some extent is that we don’t feel very worthy. And when we create from that place, we don’t shoot high enough. That’s why our results are so small. We forget that our worth is beyond measure and that we truly deserve anything we want. You don’t have to do anything to earn that worth. You are completely worthy and fully deserving just because you’re here. This is true even if you don’t believe it. But what would happen in your life if you did believe it? No matter how far you’ve come on this journey toward wholeness and self-worth, I ask you to put even more energy into your belief about being totally deserving. Dare to shoot higher and ask for nothing but the best.
What perceived limits and ceilings have you imposed upon yourself?
Step Two: Change Your Mind about Who You Believe You Are
What if all of the negative and limiting assumptions you have about yourself are wrong? Nevertheless, because you go on believing these self-imposed boundaries, you give these false ideas power over you. I’ll go out on a limb and boldly tell you that almost ALL of the confining and restrictive things you think about yourself aren’t true! You just believe they are which in turn helps perpetuate those experiences in your life. As depressing as that might sound, this is good news because you can change your mind at any time.
Step Three: Tame Your Inner Critic
Each one of us tends to be our own worst critic. You own inner critic will immediately negate a good idea the very instant it pops into your awareness. Like the devil on your shoulder, your inner critic strives to talk you out of doing what you really want and will attempt to keep you well within the boundaries of your comfort zone. It’s the ego talking which will gladly provide you with the hammer that you can beat yourself up with.
The inner critic is on a fault-finding mission and it does this so well. So be on guard. The moment you decide to go for a goal, your inner critic starts in with the negative commentaries and will cause you to doubt your abilities or question your worth. It will predict your failure and warn you about how bad you’re going to look to other people. It will tell you that you’re stupid or that you should be embarrassed or ashamed. And while it might sound convincing, it speaks of nothing but lies about why you can’t do something and why you shouldn’t even try. Don’t believe it! Choose not give it any additional energy because if you do listen, you might give up way too soon or before you even start.
Because you’re human, you will feel fear and doubt. It’s okay if you cave into the inner critic from time to time. But catch yourself so that you can consciously unplug from those habitual and conditioned messages. If you keep agreeing with that critical voice, you’ll continue to reinforce the self-sabotaging beliefs that keep you stuck or that turn up less than desirable results. Yes, that inner critic might jabber away, but you don’t have to buy into the belittling and misleading messages about how small you are. We all have an inner critic yes, but successful people have learned to override it’s messages by building strong, positive beliefs that simply outweigh them.
First Lady Eleanor Roosevelt told us,
“The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their own dreams.”
And ‘The Little Engine That Could’ chugged away,
“I think I can, I think I can, I think I can!”
Coaching Tip: Set a Goal You Believe You Can Reach
There is no sense in setting a goal you believe is unattainable because when you do this, you instantaneously move the goal out of your realm of possibilities. Set a specific and attainable goal. Have it be just out of reach but not unreachable in your mind. Your mind is your most powerful tool in manifesting success. It will readily support you in reaching what you believe is attainable and help you fail in whatever ambition you believe is not. Many well-intentioned people don’t attain their goals because they’re missing the mighty, manifesting power of belief! If you set a goal, but deep inside you don’t believe you can have or do it, you’ll set yourself up for disappointment. Start with something believable to you. As you reach this goal, you’ll build more belief such that you can set bigger goals.
• What limiting things do you tell yourself?
• How have you been holding yourself back?
• Do you push your boundaries or do you stop at the first sign of hardship?
• Do you trust that life will line up to support you after you decide upon your goals?
Coaching Action Challenge
Every time you say something negative about yourself, you are reinforcing a belief that will turn up in your results. Become aware of your negative inner dialogue this week. Catch yourself and make corrections when you put yourself down. It helps to say “Stop” or “Cancel that” or “No, that isn’t true for me anymore.”
This is perhaps the hardest challenge I’ve given you so far because you’re being asked to re-think what has become your automatic fallback position. But it’s worth trying because whatever you focus on grows. At first, it might seem a little weird to talk nicely to yourself, especially if you’re used to a lot of self-criticism. But think about it. If some of your friends talked to you the way you sometimes talk to yourself, would you continue to hang around with them? Take some time every day this week and practice reinforcing empowering ideas, which will gradually turn into hard core beliefs. And when that inner critic pipes in and tells you that you’re being a fool and that this won’t work, choose not to listen. Here are some examples:
“I know I can do it! My dream will come true”
“I am capable.” “I am resourceful.” “Everything that needs to happen will happen such that I achieve my goal.”
“It doesn’t matter what other people are thinking and doing, I know that I CAN and will succeed!”
• Belief opens the doors of miraculous opportunity and happy coincidences
• Belief keeps you moving forward when you need it most
• What you focus on grows so focus on the positive
• You will only go as far as your beliefs allow
• Be willing to reexamine your assumptions about who you think you are
• You can change your mind about yourself at any time
• There is no one ‘out there’ stopping you from living the life you truly want. Only your limited beliefs will stop you
Belief Success Formula:
Vision + Decision + Belief = Attracting the abundant possibilities needed to achieve your desires
Belief Bottom Line: If you believe it, you can achieve it